My Story

I worked in sales for 19 years and had panic attacks every day for 10 of them.

I didn’t tell anyone, except for my wife.

I was worried that I’d be seen as weak at work or that it was an excuse for not being good enough.

To me, the sales world felt full of bravado and toxic masculinity about being the best and always striving for more.

I got caught up in this narrative and thought there must be something wrong with me for not wanting to work constantly.

Most of the cultures I worked in were ruled by fear.

I felt like my every move was being watched and judged.

And regardless of how well I performed, it always felt like it wasn’t enough.

I realised that most of the time I was wearing a mask and pretending to be someone I wasn’t.

I think this gap between who I was pretending to be and who I really was caused the extreme reaction in my body.

It was trying to wake me up. To let me know I was out of alignment and hurting myself.

But I was earning £250k+ a year.

So I kept going because I didn’t want to let my family down.

And I thought I should feel grateful for the money.

I was in the top 1% of earners! Who wouldn’t want that?

But rather than the money giving me everything I’d ever wanted, it had actually trapped me in a life I struggled to enjoy.

And all I wanted to do was escape it.

Interesting how my emotional turmoil manifested as a physical expression.

Have you ever considered whether the physical or mental reactions you experience are connected to something deeper?

And is that something you are brave enough to face now?

You might believe that you’re being brave by pushing on regardless.

But the real bravery is turning inward to face it.

You might think that you’re building resilience.

But resilience against what? Feeling what wants to be felt? What’s really happening vs the story in your head?

——

I’m grateful for my experience.

It taught me that happiness doesn’t come from money and success.

And that living other people’s version of success isn’t fulfilling.

It also led me to the inner exploration - my mind, emotions, fears, intuition and life’s deeper meaning.

This has led me to peace, calm and utter clarity about who I am and what I’m here for.

And now I help others to realign and live a life without compromise.

If any of this resonates in you, I’m here to help. Be brave, and send me a DM.